Many posts all in one...
Sorry about the Hodge Podge about to ensue, I'm trying to get all my stuff out for all to read in one post...For now.
Okay, where to begin...We went to "Hooters" for the first time last Friday for my hubs brother and sister in-law's anniversary.
Sidenote: Where is the white-trashiest place to have your wedding anniversary? Yup.
So we took the boys with us, cause they, being boys, enjoy boobs, and I thought it would be easier than finding a babysitter. Hooters claims to be a "family restaurant", so I thought, "How bad could it be?"
Apparently, they get up on the tables and dance every half hour or so. By the second set, my 6YO was on a table, dancing with our waitress.
A few beers later, (had by me, not him) he asked her for her phone number, and asked her "what are you doing for breakfast?"
Um, Hi. What. The. Fuck.
As far as I know, nobody in this house talks that way, so I'll be monitoring the TV watching from here on out.
Had our first "Summer Cruise-In" at work last night. For those of you not familiar, it's where people bring their cars (old, restored, muscle, etc) to the parking lot of my bar, and drink and gawk at other cars. We give out trophies every week, all summer long.
Metro (the alcoholic bar owner/my boss) was heading up to the microphone with a box of trophies to pass out, when he tripped on a curb.
Mind you, this curb has been there since the dawn of time, but the 2 bottles of wine and 16 shots of Jaeger must have blurred his vision and/or balance a bit. He tripped.
Trying to save the trophies, he broke his fall with his face.
I hear his head literally "bounced" off the pavement.
He popped back up, bleeding and embarrassed, and proceeded to hand out trophies, all the while dripping blood.
I wonder how he's feeling today? Probably not so great, I would imagine.
On a sad note, our Manager, who is one hell of a great lady, lost her daughter to cancer this morning. She was 28 (I think) with a 4 year old son. Very sad.
On a happier note, congrats to Pirate and Potpourri, they are expecting a child together. Dogma should be posting about that any second now.
Got my hair blondish finally, after about 47 shades of orange, I finally found a color I'm happy with. Pierced my lip in a drunken spree, love it, although can we say "early midlife crisis" much?
I got the older 2 kids (11 year old boy and girl) cell phones today, just told Saddle Bag McSharpie (too lazy to link, if you don't know who it is, it's in March archives somewhere) and she was all offended, cause of course, she was going to get the girl a cell phone for her birthday.
Kinda like the time you were gonna take her for a hair cut 6 years ago, and it got so long and tangly and she could even hold her head up because of all the hair, so I finally took her, and you got mad? Yeah, I'll believe it when I see it.
Anyway, I know, I know, 11 year olds with cell phones? It's called leverage, bitches, that's right.
"Oh, you don't feel like cleaning your room?" Suspend the service. "You didn't do your homework all last week?" Suspend the service.
I'm drunk with power right now...hee hee.
Okay, where to begin...We went to "Hooters" for the first time last Friday for my hubs brother and sister in-law's anniversary.
Sidenote: Where is the white-trashiest place to have your wedding anniversary? Yup.
So we took the boys with us, cause they, being boys, enjoy boobs, and I thought it would be easier than finding a babysitter. Hooters claims to be a "family restaurant", so I thought, "How bad could it be?"
Apparently, they get up on the tables and dance every half hour or so. By the second set, my 6YO was on a table, dancing with our waitress.
A few beers later, (had by me, not him) he asked her for her phone number, and asked her "what are you doing for breakfast?"
Um, Hi. What. The. Fuck.
As far as I know, nobody in this house talks that way, so I'll be monitoring the TV watching from here on out.
Had our first "Summer Cruise-In" at work last night. For those of you not familiar, it's where people bring their cars (old, restored, muscle, etc) to the parking lot of my bar, and drink and gawk at other cars. We give out trophies every week, all summer long.
Metro (the alcoholic bar owner/my boss) was heading up to the microphone with a box of trophies to pass out, when he tripped on a curb.
Mind you, this curb has been there since the dawn of time, but the 2 bottles of wine and 16 shots of Jaeger must have blurred his vision and/or balance a bit. He tripped.
Trying to save the trophies, he broke his fall with his face.
I hear his head literally "bounced" off the pavement.
He popped back up, bleeding and embarrassed, and proceeded to hand out trophies, all the while dripping blood.
I wonder how he's feeling today? Probably not so great, I would imagine.
On a sad note, our Manager, who is one hell of a great lady, lost her daughter to cancer this morning. She was 28 (I think) with a 4 year old son. Very sad.
On a happier note, congrats to Pirate and Potpourri, they are expecting a child together. Dogma should be posting about that any second now.
Got my hair blondish finally, after about 47 shades of orange, I finally found a color I'm happy with. Pierced my lip in a drunken spree, love it, although can we say "early midlife crisis" much?
I got the older 2 kids (11 year old boy and girl) cell phones today, just told Saddle Bag McSharpie (too lazy to link, if you don't know who it is, it's in March archives somewhere) and she was all offended, cause of course, she was going to get the girl a cell phone for her birthday.
Kinda like the time you were gonna take her for a hair cut 6 years ago, and it got so long and tangly and she could even hold her head up because of all the hair, so I finally took her, and you got mad? Yeah, I'll believe it when I see it.
Anyway, I know, I know, 11 year olds with cell phones? It's called leverage, bitches, that's right.
"Oh, you don't feel like cleaning your room?" Suspend the service. "You didn't do your homework all last week?" Suspend the service.
I'm drunk with power right now...hee hee.
posted by The Mayor @6/08/2006 07:29:00 PM
9 Comments:
DEUCE! Keepin' his little pimp hand strong! I love that kid!
HOOTERS? For you ANNIVERSARY?
Come the Fuck ON! Oh well...never have been a fan of the dog pound (except for MY dog pound).
Glad to see ya back posting my friend. I will scurry off to my blog now to do my buisness.
~ Auntie DogMa
Holy crap you've been all over the place!
Anniversary at Hooters. That's ummm... different. Giggled my ass off at your son though. You've got a little playa on your hands there.
And what I wouldn't have paid to see one of my ex bar bosses fall on his face bleeding! LMAO!
I'm drunk with power myself. I gave in and gave my daughter a cell phone because of Fatty McStupid the stepmom. Now I can get a hold of my kid whenever the fuck I want to. AND, it is good leverage. It's already been a threat of being taken away a few times in a few days! yay!
Pierced lip? Blond hair? You are a crazy bitch!
Glad you're back sista - been looking for ya!
I need you to do something for me and tell me if it does this. If you take the piercing out of your lip...fill your mouth with water and try to push the water out without opening your mouth, will it squirt through the hole??? I need to know this...
OH NO YOU DIDN'T!
It does squirt water, that was one of the first things I needed to know about this peircing!! Now DogMa and me can have water shooting contests!!!
I am the CHAMP...you could never hang.
GAP TOOTHED BITCHES UNITE!!!
FUCKIN' Post something for me to chew on already...tell me a story.
WTF?
Where is Will?
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